4
There was almost no time between the crash and the death consequently many ToD’s were within seconds. It was not just the impact of the truck that killed so many passengers; it was rather the shattering of the windows which killed so much more. Later, when the newspapers reported about this accident there was a common notion that no one could believe what happened. Not only that the truck driver suffered a heart attack, which finally caused the crash, but also because the rescue was not in time since the whole accident took place outside of town. This area was just inhabited by a few people who even did not have a telephone. This was for all too much of a coincidence but as every reporter wrote, it did happen and cannot be proved wrong. (…)
Brenda was one of the saved. She was lucky since the glass did not cut so deep into her skin, so the blood loss was not life-threatening. This accident killed her former life as well as the first chance of being in love with someone. She knew from the moment she woke up in the hospital room that her nice “prey” was gone. She could simply feel it. When she finally dared to open her eyes, which were hurting as if someone stabs them with knives, she scarcely saw silhouettes of the world. Everything lay under a white haze. She heard familiar and for her soul consoling voices and realized that her parents were close to her bed talking with someone she does not know. She concludes, because she was laying in a hospital, that they were talking to a doctor who is explaining them what had happened and what she is suffering from. She tried to say a word but as soon as she was starting, she understood that they would not hear any tone. She was asking herself, why she was not able to produce any sound but was not in the position to find an answer.
This was the black day for the family. And it shadows will disseminate slowly but surely into their future life, leaving them without any consolation. The pain will stuck to all of them like thistles in animal’s fur. They will never see the life in the same way again and they will always be reminded of this day watching into their daughters face.
The doctors recommended moving to another city since they realized that Brenda was not adapting to her new life. “Maybe the South”, they suggested, “might be a good start. It offers much more sunlight, and the sunlight activates happiness hormones which would help to get use to a new life.” To give this possibly a chance they moved to North Carolina. They hoped to reinvigorate their life but stayed ultimately far off from that. The relocation merely disguised the specific problems about which nobody, especially Brenda, wanted to speak. The parents had to comprehend, that nothing can change the life how it was now. Notwithstanding their endeavors, moving to another city and trying to find a new life, could actually change something. They carried the heavy load of history to all the places they went, involuntarily and inevitably. They could not rewrite their life. That was the only truth that they had to face in this so arduous becoming life. But still there was hope. Hope to be the victor of this circle if they can vanquish this dark history in accepting it and let it guide them through the future life as a part of themselves. They understood that this middle, unexpected part created them or re-created their image of their life and will also allow them to be the persons that will live with this story and becoming the persons that they are looking for. The last but most important hope they nourished was that Brenda will perceive this insight, too. Hopefully soon.
